Frequently Asked Questions

  • What services do you offer?
    • I offer individuals, couples and family therapy.  Individual therapy is with one person over the age of 18 who wants to work on changing his or her behaviors, emotions or thoughts. Couples therapy is with 2 people who want to work on improving their relationship with different communication and listening skills. Family therapy is with members of a family who are having difficulties relating to each other and by affecting change in one member of the family it affects change in the other members of the family too.
  • Can I afford therapy?
    • Yes, because your mental well being is just as important as your physical well being. Looking after yourself is the best gift you can give yourself. You want to give yourself the opportunity to be your best self.
  • How do I know if therapy is right for me?
    • You will know therapy is right for you because you will feel a rapport with your therapist.  It is about trusting your instincts and feeling understood and validated.  You will feel that your therapist gets you.  You will feel like you are getting somewhere.  If you don’t feel these things, you can always bring this up to your therapist and see how they handle the situation.  If the therapist gets defensive then you know it is time to find another therapist to work with.
  • How does therapy work?
    • The relationship between you and the therapist is a collaborative one.  In talking about the things that are bothering you problems that you have kept to yourself and made private and just for you, are put into a social context between you and the therapist where we can then create something new.  We can make new meanings, a new relationship, a new way of speaking. Therapy helps to make you look at things in a different way.
  • How do I find a good marriage counselor?
    • You want to work with someone who is experienced working with couples because couples therapy is very different to individual therapy.  Find someone who has sought out education and training in couples dynamics and interpersonal relationships and continues to further their education in this field. Ask the therapist what percentage of their practice consists of couples work. Be sure that both partners in the relationship feel validated and understood by the therapist.  It is also important that you both trust the therapist.  You can also ask for referrals from your doctor, attorney or accountant.
  • How will I know we can work together?
    • This is a very important question. You will know you can work together if you feel some sort of connection to the therapist. Feeling comfortable to talk about anything that is bothering you with someone who cares for you is part of the therapeutic relationship. To get the most healing you need to be open and honest with someone who makes you feel understood, heard and accepts you as you are.  If you do not feel that with the therapist, then therapy will not be very effective.  The therapeutic relationship helps you feel supported to make the changes you want to make in your life.
  • How long does it take to do therapy? What results should I expect?
    • There is no set time to do therapy.  It depends on what your issues are and how quickly or slowly you delve into them. You should expect to feel a little better and hopeful at the therapy progresses.  When you become aware of how something is impacting you it is then hard not to make the changes you need to make because your awareness does not go away.  You will feel like you are making improvements and going two steps forward but then will you fall into your old way and go one step back and that is perfectly normal.  It takes a while for new habits to come into effect because our old ways are so easy to do and familiar but it will happen because your awareness will make you revisit the situation.
  • Do I need to take medications?
    • You may need to take medications if you are not able to function effectively at your work place or in your home life.  This means you are missing a lot of days for work or not getting the things you need to get done around your house. You will be provided with psychiatric referrals so that you can get medications to help you function better, which will in turn lead to therapy being more effective.  It is about being stable to be able to take on what is bothering you deep down.
  • Will you be able to help me? How?
    • I will be able to help you by providing a safe place for you to let out what is weighing you down.  In talking about your situation you will feel listened to and validated by someone who is objective and supportive and is able to give you a different perspective.  From my experiences I will be able to give you suggestions and tools on how to make the changes you want to make to your life.  It is up to you to try them and see how your life is effected or not.  We will work together to figure out what works best for you.
  • How do I bring up to my partner that I want marriage counseling?
    • If you and your partner have been fighting, struggling with financial issues, or do not know how to communicate effectively then one of you will want to consider getting outside help.  In talking to your partner about wanting marriage counseling you would want to say things from your perspective such as, “I am feeling down about how we are communicating and I would like to seek some help.” By doing it this way, your partner is more likely to hear what you are saying and be open to the suggestion.  If you come from a place of, “You do not know how to communicate and we need help”, your partner is going to become defensive and not take what you are telling him or her very kindly and not be open to the suggestion. Therefore I encourage you to ask for what you would like or need from your partner and he or she is more likely to hear your request and want to do it.