This blog post is part two of a two-part series on stress and your relationship. In this second blog post, we will talk about how to cope with stress that is caused inside of your relationship. To read the first blog post, click here.
Relationship stress can come from many different places: arguments, abuse (whether it be emotional or physical), or criticism from one or both parties. It can come from the result of a pressure situation, an affair, infertility problems, the death of a loved one, or multiple other situations.
When your relationship hits a rocky patch, how do you fix it? Avoiding the issue and allowing it to fester inside isn’t healthy for either side of the relationship, yet that seems to be one of the ways a majority of partners “deal” with stress.
Here are a few things to keep in mind if you and your partner are struggling from stress within your relationship:
Communicate: Your partner isn’t a mind reader. If something is upsetting you, talk to them about it in a calm moment. Stress has a tendency to make every situation worse, and if you are one of those people who likes to avoid problems, stress can really make you feel distressed, anxious, or even depressed. Talk to your partner about how you are feeling; it is possible that they weren’t aware of your feelings and would like to help you de-stress.
Don’t play the blame game: The blame game never works out well. It only creates a more hostile relationship. If you start blaming your partner, he/she might become defensive, and this creates the perfect grounds for a yelling match. As we talked about above, go to your partner in a moment of calm.
Reaffirm your partnership: Advanced Life Skills has an article with ideas on how to decrease relationship stress, and this was one of their points as well. Remember why you and your partner fell in love in the first place. Let your partner know just how much you value not only your relationship, but him/her as a person as well.
Seek outside help: Therapy has so many benefits, one of them being that your therapist is an objective third party who can see both sides of a relationship. If you are interested in seeing a therapist but don’t know how to ask your partner, please see our blog post here for help.
It’s important that you find a therapist that has been trained as a couples’ therapist. Reka graduated with her Master’s in Counseling Psychology and Counselor Education with an emphasis in Couples and Families and works with couples.
If you have any questions about today’s blog post, don’t hesitate to contact Reka by phone at 402-881-8125, by email at reka@omaha-counseling.com, or via Twitter or Facebook.
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photo credit: giuseppesavo via photopin cc
