Social media keeps us updated on proposals from around the globe through YouTube videos and pictures uploaded by users. Some of the proposals are quite elaborate, romantic, and thoughtful.
That romance and thoughtfulness can be easy to come by in the beginning of a relationship. But after some time, after all the busyness of a workday and getting the kids to school and other activities, romancing your partner can be the last thing on your mind.
Marriages that don’t get a regular dose of passion shows signs of stress: sadness, frustration, resentment, more arguments, loneliness, and withdrawal. As busy as you and your spouse may be, it’s crucial to make time for each other and for romance.
Here are a few reminders to help you and your partner find romance again:
There’s a difference between romance and sex. A strong relationship typically has a healthy level of both romance and sex, but it’s easier for partners to forget about the romance part. Romance is about letting your partner know how much you appreciate them and what they do for you and your family. It’s about showing your love and letting them know that you think about them throughout the day. In most relationships, if you want sex to be great, you have to fully engage in romance.
Give daily compliments. If you notice your partner’s hair looks particularly good that day, let her know. If he’s wearing a shirt that you love, tell him how good he looks in it. Compliments toward your partner show that you notice them. Compliment them on their looks, a funny joke they told, how great dinner was, or on a great idea they had.
Make time for each other daily. Quality time is crucial for a relationship to survive and grow. Take walks together. Drive together. Both present an opportunity for you to communicate and reconnect after a long day. Every week, try to spend at least one night alone together: make supper together, go out for dessert, see a movie, or go to a sporting event. Try new things together, and do things that will remind you of your earlier dating days.
Be intentional. You don’t have to go out of your way to romance your partner. You also don’t have to spend a lot of money. If a song comes on the radio that reminds you of them, shoot them a quick text or email about it. Drop a letter for them in the mailbox. Leave a Post-It Note on the mirror while your partner is in the shower. Surprise your partner with takeout after work on a day that you know has been difficult for them. If there’s a funny picture or article online, post it to their Facebook wall.
What do you and your partner do to keep the romance alive? Let us know in the comment section below. If you’d like to set up an appointment with Reka, you can contact her by phone at 402-881-8125, by email at reka@omaha-counseling.com, or via Twitter or Facebook.
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photo credit: Françoise et Richard à la plage via photopin (license)